Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
