when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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