The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I AM VODKA MAN
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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