i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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