with your own penis?
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Hippo gnu deer
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
