He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
