Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
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