No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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