He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
