fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
These tits shall not be calmed
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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