i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize