oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Randomize
