If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
why do cheetos always look like penises
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
