there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
