Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize