3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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