are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
