Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
