yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
