and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
