Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Randomize
