I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
