She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize