So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
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