I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
