I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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