Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I want to have your abortion
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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