i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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