Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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