Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize