none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
well you can't waste a boner
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize