I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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