Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
