this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
