Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize