I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I want her autograph on my taint
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
