I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize