but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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