I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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