dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
