Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
