I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize