It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
