I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
