I heard we made out
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
