so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
found the other keg... it's in the tree
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
