I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
It all started with a game of naked twister.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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