he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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