in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
