That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Blood and glitter go together right?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Randomize
