i need an iv and a liver transplant
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
